What if Solid Snake was a Roomba? Or maybe if Macaulay Culkin, rather than being a cute trap-setting kid, was a cute, murderous, trap-setting vacuum cleaner? Well, Justice Sucks is here to answer those questions. Spoiler alert: it answers these questions really really well!
“Justice Sucks plays out in a very accessible isometric perspective, allowing you to see plenty of the area around you and plan your attacks accordingly.”
Your name is Dusty McClean and you are a robot vacuum cleaner. You’re essentially a Roomba that is remotely connected to the other devices within your home. What this means is that at any point, you can hack into these devices and use them to your advantage. This comes in particularly handy when your home is invaded and your family kidnapped.
You can hack your way into the system, slamming doors shut on enemies, shooting jets of fire from the oven, or setting off wall sockets to electrocute your victims! Think Watch Dogs, but instead of being a grizzly old man or a joke-spouting teenager, you’re a Roomba. You know, the little robot that bounces into walls all the time.
All of this plays out in a very accessible isometric perspective, allowing you to see plenty of the area around you and plan your attacks accordingly. When accessing the Hack menu time slows somewhat, allowing you to access the best trap for your current situation. The traps vary in damage effect, and can even be overpowered by adding other elemental actions. As an example, setting a sprinkler off and then overcharging a power socket will increase the electrical damage if your enemy is standing in the puddle left by the sprinkler.
“The cat-spitting animation is particularly hilarious as your enemies are scratched to ribbons by a fuming feline.“
But hacking isn’t the only tool at your disposal here. You are, after all, a vacuum cleaner. What use would you be if you couldn’t suck up objects and spit them back at your enemies? Such objects range from kitchen knives to plates and random detritus, through to… cats. The cat-spitting animation is particularly hilarious as your enemies are scratched to ribbons by a fuming feline.
Of course, some of the hacks drain more of your enemy’s health than just flinging stuff at them, but it’s all a part of planning your next move. Spitting objects out is particularly useful if you’ve been spotted and are being chased as it will quickly slow down your pursuers, allowing you to run and hide.
Once all of your enemies are vanquished you then have one final task to complete – clean-up! I keep saying this, but you are a vacuum cleaner! The clean-up involves rushing around the level with a one-minute timer as you try to suck up all the blood and bodies you have left behind. It’s equally as gruesome and humorous as it sounds.
“Different perks and abilities can be selected at the start of each mission, allowing you to customise your loadout based on the task at hand.”
This brings me to the “blood abilities”. Sucking up your enemies during playthrough adds to your blood meter. This, in turn, unlocks various special abilities which you use throughout the game. These are again widely varied and add another level to your potential tactics during a mission.
Throughout your playthrough, you will also unlock various perks alongside the aforementioned blood abilities. Different perks and abilities can be selected at the start of each mission, allowing you to customise your loadout based on the task at hand. For example, you may have a mission focused solely on clean-up. Activating a stealth perk here would be particularly pointless, as there is nothing to hide from.
“You take on Family Corp, the evil corporation that created you and kidnapped your family”
There are five worlds in total within Justice Sucks, with each one offering a unique set of varied missions. There is the standard “story” mission, and then multiple side-missions played out on the same map. These range from clean-up where the aim is to clean up as much blood as possible within the time limit, or stealth missions where you have to deactivate bombs without ever being spotted.
Beyond these worlds, there are a couple of final mission-only levels as you take on Family Corp, the evil corporation that created you and kidnapped your family. These play out in much the same way as the rest of the game, with a little extra mini-game thrown in at the end.
The only downside for me would be the lack of additional worlds. One world in particular (set in a club) seemed a bit too cramped for me to really let loose and left me somewhat frustrated as I tried to beat each of the individual missions. Still, there is plenty to unlock and new missions added on completion of the main story.
Each mission also comes with a rating and a leaderboard, too. So multiple playthroughs are not only possible, but a lot of fun, as you try to gain the coveted “S+” rating on each of the levels
“I can honestly say, that while I recognised familiar elements, I have never played anything quite like Justice Sucks.”
All in all, the game is an engaging mash-up of stealth, humour and quirkiness. I can honestly say, that while I recognised familiar elements, I have never played anything quite like Justice Sucks. The mechanics are solid and the viewpoint never left me frustrated and unable to see what I needed to do. Sure, the game lacks some depth, but for something fun, quick, and a little bonkers, you can’t go wrong with Justice Sucks.
Justice Sucks releases September 8th for PC, PlayStation, Xbox and Switch.
*Disclaimer: Reviewed on PS5; code was provided by the Publisher.
